I think a major problem with 'comments' in general is the inability to convey the emotion of the sentence(s), i.e. sarcasm, doubt, fear, pensiveness, etc. This problem is amplified by taking comments too literally - we are after all, conversing via the Internet and not face-to-face. Furthermore, I think that the defence of ones opinions is, of course, important. But, this is supposed to be an open forum of critique where we should all (anonymous or not) feel free to express our views/ideas/feelings in whatever way we see fit (of course, without too much maliciousness). Criticism is nothing but fluff if it’s not constructive – and sometimes (but not always) it can be a tough pill to swallow.
I like this work Jess. I think that it's the first piece of yours in a while that seems to have some guts. You have a lot of experience (especially of late) to draw from, get it outta ya!
Some other comments on a re-reading: -Where is she going? Where is she? What does she need? What does she owe?
"Show don't tell", as they say, but don't remain too obscure. This is a piece of hurt/wanting (redemption even?) so lets have the meat!
-Neanderthal is nice, but who is he? Why is he neanderthal? I'm not saying write a biography, but why am I believing this guy/thing is a neanderthal? Because you told me?
Sorry about this one! Duty free wild turkey made me do it. I was just sitting there and my "little black book", which actually has a world map on it and is more pastel blue and green in colour started talking to me.
As far as comments go... I'm a big believer in freedom of expression. "Victim" is perhaps a better title for this piece. OR if indeed "victim" is some sort of ad-hominem attack against a poem, then I'd have to say:
"Let them eat cake".
I'll give you another from my "little black book" as soon as it speaks again.
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9 comments:
Yikes, what's this about?
Or should I ask? Maybe I'll just interpret.
Victim.
So what's the differnece between a neanderthal and a cro-magnon?
(it sounds like the opener to a joke or something?)
and are there more from the black book?
I think anonymous posts should remain an option, just not used as cover for attacks or stupid comments.
I think a major problem with 'comments' in general is the inability to convey the emotion of the sentence(s), i.e. sarcasm, doubt, fear, pensiveness, etc. This problem is amplified by taking comments too literally - we are after all, conversing via the Internet and not face-to-face. Furthermore, I think that the defence of ones opinions is, of course, important. But, this is supposed to be an open forum of critique where we should all (anonymous or not) feel free to express our views/ideas/feelings in whatever way we see fit (of course, without too much maliciousness). Criticism is nothing but fluff if it’s not constructive – and sometimes (but not always) it can be a tough pill to swallow.
I like this work Jess. I think that it's the first piece of yours in a while that seems to have some guts. You have a lot of experience (especially of late) to draw from, get it outta ya!
Some other comments on a re-reading:
-Where is she going? Where is she? What does she need? What does she owe?
"Show don't tell", as they say, but don't remain too obscure. This is a piece of hurt/wanting (redemption even?) so lets have the meat!
-Neanderthal is nice, but who is he? Why is he neanderthal? I'm not saying write a biography, but why am I believing this guy/thing is a neanderthal? Because you told me?
Again, beauty work.
Is she the Neanderthal?
Is someone being brutalised?
Have you been brutalised, or have you brutalised?
Who am I kidding, those are such rhetorical questions.
DonMaximo: Maximo.
Macri, you're the friggin' best.
:)
Sorry about this one! Duty free wild turkey made me do it. I was just sitting there and my "little black book", which actually has a world map on it and is more pastel blue and green in colour started talking to me.
As far as comments go...
I'm a big believer in freedom of expression. "Victim" is perhaps a better title for this piece. OR if indeed "victim" is some sort of ad-hominem attack against a poem, then I'd have to say:
"Let them eat cake".
I'll give you another from my "little black book" as soon as it speaks again.
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